It's been a bad morning. Let me first say that Emmett is fine physically. He is improving everyday. I guess I can't ask for much more than that. Unfortunately, his spirits are completely deflated. He is unhappy, uncomfortable, confused and just...sad. It is so hard to see my vibrant, active young son just laying there, looking up at me with these eyes that beg for mercy. Every time medicine is delivered to him, he stiffens up and starts shaking--just by seeing the bag. He has major people anxiety. When the team of doctors came around this morning for rounds, he absolutely broke down, crying and cowering in fear. Not to mention, he is sharing a nurse with another patient that requires about 90% of her time. So, if it weren't for Joe and I being here, who knows how long he would sit in pain or hunger or in a wet diaper. It is not the nurse's fault, she is great, but it's just too much for one person. I voiced my concerns and I think that this afternoon will be better. On the positive side, one of our favorite doctors here, Dr. Cisco, is putting some things in place to help him feel more at home--a pain management team is coming to talk to us about alternate forms of pain relief (since it takes me 30 minutes to give him any meds orally), he is advancing E's diet to include non-clear foods (thank goodness!), and he is going to TRY to convince the surgical to take out his chest tube which causes so much discomfort. In addition, E's nurse is trying to get some toys for him to play with and the therapy dog to come pay him a visit. I know it has only been 6 days, but it is just so hard to see him like this. I keep telling myself that we're doing the right thing, but trying to get a 2 year old to buy into that isn't so easy.
Sorry for such a depressing post, but this is what is on my mind and my heart. I know that in a couple weeks, we will be celebrating Christmas and E's birthday and all will be back to normal, but for now, it's heartbreaking. Hopefully, my post tonight will be much more positive. Hugs and kisses from Big E to all of you!
5 comments:
Oh, Missy! I read this and know that you are just feeling so sad. It's got to be hard to just wait. E WILL bounce back and be his wonderful, cheerful self. Time must be moving at a snails pace for you, but know that better days are ahead. We have all of you in our thoughts daily and are hoping for a happier, smiling E very, very soon!!!
Love, Pam, Andy and Steph
Missy and Joe I am so sorry, I wondered why you had not called because I called you and left a message. , but now you called so I guess I feel better. We will just keep praying and praying. Poor little thing he is so scared, and I know you both have to be so tired. LOVE YOU SO MUCH. MOM AND DAD
To my MIssy, Joe and Big E
I knew something was going on when there was no post this morning. Its okay you vent all you want cause I know it is breaking your heart. My poor baby, I know how it is even though I can't be there, Libby is the same way with doctors and nurses. If you need me I will come, you guys just say the word. You know i am here just waiting to leave. I can't wait to hold my boy i miss him so much. Tell him grandma is coming to spoil him so he needs to get well and baby misses him too.
Love you keep your chin up everyday will be better I love you all so much
Oh Missy and Joe my heart goes out to you all right now. I am so sorry you have to go through this right now and that Emmett is so scared. He will be fine once you get out of there and back to his environment but in the meantime, I am sure that doesn't make it any easier. Just know we are constantly thinking of you all and saying prayers. Mimi said a special prayer at dinner tonight it was sooo cute. We love you guys. xoxo Christina
Missy, I am so sorry that you, E and Joe are having a sad day. I pray that the day did get better for all three of you.
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